The tabloids have been on a streak with Brangelina divorce stories, probably because both Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie failed utterly at awards season. Obviously, this means that Brad and Angelina are ZOMG GETTING A DIVORCE!!!
According to the latest report from the National Enquirer, that’s exactly what it means. ‘Sources’ tell the Enquirer that Brad was so furious with the whole ‘no sex’ pact that he walked out on Angelina. They explain, “Complaining over their ‘sexless nights,’ Brad was so upset that he left Angie and walked out! The two have hit rock bottom in their relationship, and Brad feels like it’s over. Their joyous nuptials, which came years after being partners and parents together, now seem like a lifetime ago.”
Right. I’m sure that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have stopped having sex, which also started the same time that pigs started flying and rainbows started dancing. They may have had little spats here and there that prevented them from having sex on a regular basis, but to ban sex completely? Does that seem like the Angelina Jolie we know and love? If anything, that’s as anti-Angelina Jolie as you can get.
Plus, the report also touches upon Angelina’s and Brad’s rumored trip to Colorado to ‘reconnect’, but apparently that failed too. At the end of the day, I think it’s safe to say that the Enquirer assumes that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie will let their marriage fall apart because of no sex and fighting over inconsequential things. I mean, it’s not like they have six children together and more important things to worry about, right?